I would like to introduce you an idea of mindsets, to best explain what I mean I will use a metaphor of mind as an operating system of a brain. If we can use that reference, a mindset would be a simple yet very powerful program, that affects a part of the whole of operating systems function. Separating the idea of mindset, using the analogy of mind being a set of different mindsets, we open the possibility of installing, uninstalling and tweaking these individual functions so that they can better serve our purpose.
I have a background in NLP (Neuro-Linguisitic Programming), although I have never practiced being a coach, I do have the certification, that in result, over years of contemplation has allowed me to understand the flexibility and actually simplicity of how our brain works. I don’t believe in differentiating between introverts and extroverts, nor strict and humanistic personalities. I believe that our minds are so elastic we can be any of these or both at the same time, depending on mood and desire. All I have learned through NLP boils down to a simple understanding, that our brain is a pattern-recognition machine. Our behaviour depends on previous experiences in almost binary manner. A few simple examples:
- I ate chocolate, I felt good, I like chocolate, I eat more chocolate
- I went jogging, didn’t like it, I struggled to go jogging again
- I went jogging, had great time, it was easier for me to go jogging another time
But the brain and patterns it sees are much more granular than what we can notice with rational minds without making an effort to do so. Let’s look at a more complex example
- I was sitting with my legs crossed while working in a cafe, and even though I didn’t realise I enjoyed smell of coffee and background music, which my brain has recorded as a pattern of crossed legs creating a positive environment. Therefore, later this day, when I came back home and crossed my legs, have recalled the atmosphere of the cafe and I suddenly thought about email I was writing at the time
This level of complexity is hard to notice. The pattern recorded in the brain becomes accidental from the perspective of rational mind. We all have our unique experiences, based on cognitive capabilities, our cultural or linguistic background, our environment, people we meet. These over time form our personalities and what we believe forms “me” or “myself” or “I”. But as soon as you notice where the personality comes from, what are the patterns that shape your self, your mind becomes flexible and possible. It’s ever changing anyway, and you are not now who you were five or ten years ago, but having the understanding helps to take informed decisions and make choices, as opposed to just being a product of all the external stimuli.
Having this understanding you open the door to downloading, removing and tweaking the mindsets or programs that shape your personality, in a conscious manner that is.
“The Universe is Mental, held in the Mind of THE ALL.” ~ The Kybalion.
What’s more, from practical perspective, we can start an exploration, looking for these mindsets, sharing and exchanging with one another, speeding up the cognitive evolution or evolution of personality. As an example, a real-life example this time, I have noticed that I am not nearly as enthusiastic about social encounters in crowded places, as some of my friends are. I get tired and bored quickly at parties that aren’t boring to them, my friends. We share values, we share ideas and concepts, we are friends, and yet our experience of a party is wildly different… Why is that and can I do something that will turn my boredom into energy at parties? Having the realisation, that I can download my friends mindset, into my mind, and benefit from something that is one of the most positive aspects of his personality, I asked him to provide me with as accurate understanding, feeling, pattern, the mindset.
One of the things he shared, was that he is curious about the individual people at a party. Now, knowing this is already a big forward for me. Because I am curious about why and how is he curious about these people.
I am starting to learn, understand and finally while time passes I will be able to know his mindset. To know, means to really install the program, being able to benefit from its features.
Being able to change your personality is priceless. You probably have heard about the law of attraction, I do believe we get what we want. We all carry an infinite potential, our biggest limit is ourselves. So if ourselves is not a limit anymore, well… sky is the limit.
I admit the example of myself struggling to sustain excitement at parties is not comprehensive. It’s not a mindset you can download. It’s not mindset I can easily install, yet. Due to lack of awareness on let’s call it Theory of Mindset Download, lack of framework, the process isn’t efficient yet, but it could be. Following is my proposal for the first iteration of mindset download process. Perhaps someday the definition will be so clear we will find a good word for it.
Intuitively I want to ask “what do you like about parties”, but asking this wouldn’t get me far. Mindset can arouse all sorts of feelings, liking is simplistic perspective and I am not looking into illusory feeling of agreeableness nor enjoyment, perhaps because I am a nonconformist or perhaps because I believe eating sugar longterm isn’t healthy. In my example, the answer I was looking for, is “why do I not get energy out of parties, whilst others alike do”. Which can be further transformed into “how does my friend get energy out of parties”. But what I really want to know is “what does my friend think in the moment when he sees other people at a party, how does he see them, how can I notice the same thing and therefore feel energised at parties”.
Since mindsets form personality, I refrain to personality research to find elements that can help us define it. Oxford’s dictionary definition reads “the established set of attitudes held by someone”. While “Personality is defined as the characteristic sets of behaviors, cognitions, and emotional patterns that evolve from biological and environmental factors.[1] While there is no generally agreed upon definition of personality, most theories focus on motivation and psychological interactions with one’s environment” Sadock, Benjamin; Sadock, Virginia; Ruiz, Pedro (2017). Kaplan and Sadock’s Comprehensive Textbook of Psychiatry. Wolters Kluwer. ISBN 978–1–4511–0047–1.
To me that means then, that a mindset is a set of attitudes, behaviours, cognitions, emotional patterns, behavioural patterns and habits. What questions can we ask to get the gist of other peoples mindsets? Share your ideas in the comments, and subscribe to get an update on mindsets experiments and its results.
To be continued…